Believing What You Wish

SquareApple_smIn the past week three clients arrived with the same issue.  In each case the person felt discounted by a group of people, got angry, and let the people know.  Expressing anger allowed them to demand to be heard, an improvement over saying nothing, yet it didn’t satisfy any one of them because the targets of their anger didn’t respond how the person wished.  I assisted each client from their soul’s perspective in their individual Akashic Records but the common theme provoked me to investigate it further.

Although one case involved the client’s employees and the other two related to family members, each person’s “I won’t be marginalized” anger started with expecting people to behave out of character.  We usually know what behaviors to expect since people tend to behave fairly consistently over time.  Your anger may flare up when people don’t behave as you think they “should,” even when the preferred behavior wouldn’t be consistent with what you know about them.  If you expect people to be who they are, you won’t find yourself flying into a rage when they do what they normally do instead of what you wish they would do.  For example, if you’ve repeatedly asked your parents for money and they consistently decline, chances are the next time you ask they’ll say no.  Would it be nice to have generous parents?  Absolutely.

Knowing how the people in your life usually behave doesn’t mean you accept unacceptable behavior.  It means you go in clear-sighted and aware of likely outcomes.  If you need to set boundaries, you do so.  If you need to request a change, you do.  If you need to remove yourself from the situation, by all means take care of yourself.  Otherwise bear in mind people tend to change slowly, if at all, and you get to choose how you approach your relationships knowing what you know about each person.  Giving people room to be themselves, however messy or annoying they might seem in the moment, also frees you to be who you are.  This situation reflects a primary theme of the records, namely how everyone is fundamentally good, even the people currently provoking you to anger.  Strangely liberating for you and for them!

6 comments

  1. Just working on this with one of my new clients. So thanks, again, Christy. Rosenberg who wrote Nonviolent Communication – says that it is important to accept that that other person is doing the best they can. When I read that, I wanted to say – OH SURE! But it’s true.

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    • Yes, Janet, the concept of everyone doing the best they can comes up repeatedly in the records. I find it helpful to frame it as “the best they can in any given moment,” it doesn’t mean it’s their all-time highest potential best in the absence of current stressors. I’m glad this post resonated and thanks for your comment!

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  2. This is so wonderful and timely for me to hear, Christy. I particularly appreciate your words of “I won’t be marginalized” anger. It says so much and provides direct access to core beliefs and helping any of understand the source of our anger, whatever the details of the circumstance might be.
    Thank you for sharing such great insight.

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    • Tricia, thank you for your continued interest and your comment. I’m glad to know of the post’s timeliness for you! “Marginalized” was my working title for the post so I love knowing the phrase spoke to you.

      Anger is a tricky beast with many disguises. Leveraging our awareness around how we create our own reality helps us tame the beast. 🙂

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