Shifting From Pros and Cons to Knowing

knowing_smWhen one of the women I mentor started debating her pros and cons list related to a significant career decision, I suggested she tune into what she knew versus what she thought, something I often hear in the Akashic Records.  Reflecting on this I realized I dropped my own once beloved pros and cons lists years ago and noticed how much more confident I feel without them.  While pros and cons lists might help when making more minor choices, they often undermine bigger, life-altering decisions.

Why shift from pros and cons lists to knowing?

  • Investing time and energy in the list suggests you don’t know what you want.  Somewhere inside you your knowing awaits and can surface once the external noise and internal chatter subside.  Rather than make a list, get quiet, grounded, and still.  The answer shall come.  If waiting feels uncomfortable, focus lightly on what you know, not on what you don’t know.
  • Collectively we’ve fallen under the spell of the right answer and the associated deep fear of getting it wrong.  Pros and cons focus our mind energy on finding the “right” answer but don’t always lead us where our souls long to head.  Plus as you tally pros and cons you might bias it to get the outcome you think you “should” or inadvertently overemphasize something of lesser importance to you and thereby bypass your own knowing while trusting a tool outside of yourself to compute the answer.
  • Linear pros and cons don’t access heart and soul well, plus they tend to distance you from how the options feel.  Beware when thinking morphs into overthinking, when you end up questioning what you thought you knew, leaving you even more unsure.  In contrast, knowing feels easy and aligned.

For those interested in Jin Shin Jyutsu® (JSJ) acupressure self-helps, many support decision-making. Some options include Safety Energy Lock (SEL) 2 to address indecision, gallbladder and liver organ self-helps to harmonize the fear of dissatisfaction, or the powerful combination of placing your thumb on your SEL 18 (be still) with your fingers on your SEL 17 (intuition) for calm clarity.
JSJ Safety Energy Locks  
JSJ Organ Function Self-Helps 

When do you find pros and cons lists helpful and when don’t you?  Does giving up pros and cons lists seem scary?  How about a what feels aligned and what doesn’t list?

10 comments

  1. Great points, Christy. As a culture, we’re afraid of silence, but those who cultivate it are true to who they are. Have you read Quiet, by Susan Cain, about the power of Introverts in an Extraverted society? Fascinating reading, and it affirms – among so many other things – our inner knowing.

    Like

    • Thanks, Karen. I love the way you describe the connection between silence and being true to oneself!

      I’ve had Quiet sitting unread on my bookshelf for many months, thanks for the reminder.

      All the best,
      Christy

      Like

  2. I’m grateful for your sharing this insight – (useful word!) and reminding me. It does take practice to get used to trusting an inner voice, once it has made up it’s mind. Silence is the root of imagination.

    Like

  3. Love this => “Linear pros and cons don’t access heart and soul well, plus they tend to distance you from how the options feel.” I tend to over-analyze everything and often struggle with reaching a decision. Thank you for reminding us to take that pause and trust our feelings.

    Like

  4. When knowledge evolves into knowing, we approach freedom from linearity – and that, in itself, can be a scary feeling. This is where intuitives like you can play a role, and gently lead people home – towards knowing.
    Great post – keep guiding 🙂
    K.

    Like

    • Thanks for your comment and kindness, K.! I love what you wrote. Knowledge definitely must give way to knowing sometimes and, yes, freedom from anything we’re accustomed to can feel scary. May we all continue heading toward home.
      Many blessings,
      Christy

      Like

  5. Beautiful post Christy! Tapping into what we “know” vs what we “think” is so calming and empowering. When I get in my head and try and figure something out, I feel so unsure…like pros and cons I will reach for anything to confirm I am making the “right” decision. Getting into the space of knowingness within takes all of that away – there is such a peace that comes over me and its no longer about right and wrong – its about what feels good – a connection/alignment to it. The questioning melts away at that point. I loved the way you described “trusting a tool outside of yourself to compute an answer” – that’s exactly how it I feel when I get in my head too much. Thank you for sharing this!

    Like

    • Thank you, Karen! You’re so right and I love the way you put it – there’s something about trying to get reassurance from our heads which can never satisfy us or bring the calm we’re seeking. Once we let go of the need to “figure it out” we realize we knew all along! I’m so glad my post resonated.
      Peace and blessings,
      Christy

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s