Do you have a friend or family member who struggles, seems stuck, and sometimes even asks for advice but then doesn’t take it? You feel for the person, want to help, but eventually might feel tired and frustrated not seeing any progress despite your efforts and concern for them.
Remember every experience aligns perfectly with what each person wants to master as a soul, both you and the person you want to help. That means the stuck person learns from their situation while you learn from your response to it. The person shall remain stuck until they get unstuck on their own personal perfect timing which may seem uncomfortably long and unnecessary to you. Remind yourself internal shifts may not show themselves immediately.
Love the person in the midst of their human difficulty. Stuck people suffer and when someone tells them how they can get out of it, implying if they’d just act on the advice they’d liberate themselves, it increases their suffering. Love them, listen deeply, and assure them you have confidence they’ll work through this challenge. Use your discernment around finding additional support and resources if the person exhibits high risk behaviors.
When someone you want to help won’t take your advice and you feel frustrated with them, you direct negative energy toward yourself as well. You want to help! Why can’t you get them to listen? Underneath this lies your own sense of failure, your inability to relieve their suffering and to manage the situation including your own feelings. So love yourself more deeply, forgive yourself for your limited impact on the situation, and give yourself tender care. Managing your own discomfort around the person’s dilemma can help discharge some of the intense energy you both feel which often helps them more than any advice you could give.
When you feel stuck, what kind of help do you want from family and friends? Does advice make you feel better or worse?