Simplicity: Focus on What Matters To You

Simplicity: Focus On What Matters To You
Simplicity: Focus On What Matters To You

I began writing this post while on the plane headed to my mother’s home to help her clear fifty years of accumulated items, move and store what she’ll need in Vermont, sell two cars, and start the home selling process with a realtor. Both of us must begin again, to adjust to our new reality, to cope with both the practical and emotional aspects of a huge life transition. To cope with the chaos of this time, I must return to what matters most to me, downsizing my self-expectations along with my mother’s belongings.

“Simply be yourself.” Simple but not easy when you want to alleviate someone’s suffering or to avoid judgment or to keep the unwanted and unhelpful internal voices at bay. Simply being yourself preloads healing, as it propels you into a zone of effectiveness, alignment, and ease.

“Look past the fanfare and drama to what is enduring.” Fanfare and drama can distract you, to perhaps miss the deeper importance and meaning of the unfolding events. As my blog reader Joanne Guidoccio reminded me last week, it helps to ask whether the current issue will matter in ten years. It may not matter in ten months, days, or even minutes.

“Take time to clarify what is important to you and let nonessentials fall away.” A mindful inventory of what does and doesn’t matter to you can dramatically improve your satisfaction and your productivity. You cannot address core issues when caught in minutia, just as I face gridlock when I take my eye off the “crumbs” on my mother’s move – Cars, Realtor, Move (making sure she retrieves her essentials and treasures), and Shred.

How do you know when you need to simplify? What brings you back to what matters to you?

*Simplicity quotes from The Original Angel Card Book – Inspirational Messages and Meditations by Kathy Tyler and Joy Drake

6 comments

  1. I know I need to simplify when I’ve got too much going on in my head at once. It’s good to know there are things I can do to clear the clutter – by literally clearing clutter, making mindful choices, and letting go of tasks that don’t matter. When I’m in a state of balancing too many spinning plates in the air at once, it’s okay if some of those plates smash to the floor while I tend to what’s most important.

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    • Hi Julie,
      Thanks for your comment. I love the spinning plates metaphor – it’s the perfect descriptor and quite the visual image as well! I’ll also enjoy playing with clearing the big three you mentioned: stuff, mind, and tasks. Simplifying can bring such relief!
      All the best,
      Christy

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  2. Hi Christy, Five years ago, my brothers and I dismantled my mother’s home. She had just moved into a retirement home and had a room that was about 300 square feet in size. Getting rid of 50+ years of stuff was a challenge and one that took several months to accomplish. A great deal of emotion was involved on everyone’s part. I can still recall the advice my mother received from one of the health care practitioners: “You’re starting a new life and you need to make space for it. Let the old stuff go and embrace your new circumstances.” Easier said than done, but my mother did eventually settle in to her new home and find new friends.

    I wish you and your mother well as you start this new journey together.

    Joanne 🙂

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    • Hi Joanne,
      Thanks for your comment and for sharing your experience. It’s always great to hear of a success story. We’re doing this downsize over the course of a couple weeks following her own clearing of a couple more weeks. Luckily where we think she’s moving has about 900 square feet but it’s still a huge undertaking.
      Thanks for your good wishes,
      Christy 🙂

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  3. I try to remember if a negative even is something which will haunt me in the next 10 years, and often it isn’t. The trick is to keep remembering it, or to not add any subconscious meaning to a current bad reality.

    Thanks for posting

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    • Hi Julian,
      The “in ten years trick” really works, doesn’t it? It definitely helps not to overlay negative meanings over what’s happening. I continue to be amazed and impressed with the mind’s ability to soothe or bring angst based on the thoughts we generate. Thanks again for commenting.
      Warm regards,
      Christy

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